Mind Diarrhea

It has admittedly been too long since I have posted anything.  I have no excuse, other than, I just haven’t had the energy/ time to do it.

I had yesterday off, as the girl are out of school yesterday and today.  Naked Hubby is home today, with pants on, with me and the girls.  He was on a work trip for a few days this last week and was greeted back to the office with a WEEK long trip beginning Tuesday.  SERIOUSLY?!

It is hard with him gone.  That little bit of help.  That little bit of sanity.  That little bit of adult to talk to.  That little bit of just having someone in my corner.  That little bit of peace knowing if I did so desire, I could run away for an hour or two.  That little bit of boy power that I find myself so desperatley needing when he is gone.  However, I am learning that I am able to do a lot.  I can take care of the Peanut and the not mines and work, and for the most part have the house within reason.  I am going to try to keep that from within reason to a step above where it has been.  Then I am going to try to learn the boy things that I would love to have done, but are not sure how to do or have never done.  I am going to do fall clean up, well some of it.  I am going to learn how to mudd and tape and finish the wall downstairs.  I am going to learn how to winterize the motorcycles.  I am going to learn how to fix a leaky pipe.  I am going to learn how to finish projects that are left.  And it all else fails, we have a “Naked Hubby is away on work let’s fix up my house party.”  Yeah, I know, not a real fun party theme, but hey beer and beef make things a lot more fun.

Peanut is doing… well… ok… good… fair at school.  We are having a few new/old issues rise again.  It is hard to know how to handle them, especially when the goal most days is to do the basics and get through the day with everyone having their needs met.  I am not sure how to help her learn to listen the first time.  This is compounded with the fact that I watch her and I see she is starting to not hear as well as she did after having the tubes.  I think we are going to try another round of the medication.  She is less that thrilled about the idea of that.  I think we need to try it.  I am hoping that the part of her not listening is because she isn’t hearing as well as she could.  I do see that being a small part of it.  I do know I have to focus on the first time instructions.  It is frustrating.  How do you do a trial and error method of teaching when you have so many voices, so many ideas, so many loving and willing participants, but so little ability to update them as to what the trial is going to be?  I don’t know. 

I enjoy my new job.  I love working.  I really haven’t had the moments of “I don’t want to go to work.” I know, as with any job, that will change.  I like what I do.  I love the people I work with and for and those who I may affect.  Today is one month.  One month of being in the workforce.  *toast*

The house is slowly gaining the clean that I like and need.  It was bad for a few days as the not mines and I decided to have a sleep over and just not really care about cleanin gup after ourselves.  I needed that time.   They needed that time.  Now it is time to get back onto routine. 

Yummy apple crisp right out of the oven.  That’s what I am smelling right now.  I can’t wait until it is cooled enough to eat it.  Fall in Minnesota is a great time to eat.  Lots of apples, lots of pumpkins… it is a time that I never used to care for.  I see the beauty now.  I see the colors.  I see the shedding of the leaves not as a mess to clean up as a chance to prepare for winter and to enjoy the last days of warm sunlight.  To get outside and smell the crispness in the air and to enjoy a warm baked treat.  To have those last campfires with leaves and twigs picked up off the ground by small hands.  To sit back and relax as the colors whirl around the helmet as you dance down the curvy road on a motorcycle.  I love the places and things we can do with the girls now.  Apple picking, pumpkin picking, leaf raking and jumping, the playground explorations, the search for the largest leaf on the ground… the way you no longer notice the chill in the air as you are running and laughing and playing.  ahhh, fall is becoming a time that I can love rather than wish for another moment.

This moment is the moment I need to be in.  I discovered that.  Between working, kids, family, marriage, house, friends, pets, self… the moment I am in is the moment that needs my full attention.  Things are pretty cool when you can do it.  I know it is going to take a lot of preactice for that.  Turning off the phone.  Turning off the tv.  Turning off the brain.  To be where you are and to focus on what you are doing… hard to do however the rewards are greater than you can imagine when you can get yourself to do it.

That’s a lot of mind diarrhea.  Lots going on up there.  I will try to find my battery charger for the camera and post a few of the recent pictures I have.  The charger is in my purse… which one I am not sure, but it is in one.

Have a great fall day.  Take a moment to just be in the moment.  Love your coffee with all your attention.  Listen to your child tell a story as if your life depended on each word.  Laugh and mean it.

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~ by monrae on October 17, 2008.

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